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“In Bermuda They Call Mirrors Leaks”

09.30.2021 by Fred Berman //

In “Breakfast of Champions” Kilgore Trout explained to me that in Bermuda, his place of birth, they call mirrors leaks.  So if someone there says “I am going to take a leak,” it means they are about to steal a mirror.  It got me thinking about what other words or statements mean other things to other people based on their origin, generation, intelligence or even gender.  I thought of a few examples where you must look beyond the obvious to find the truth.  Let’s start with communications between spouses or any romantically linked couple:

They Say:   “I don’t need a present, I just need you.”   
It Means:    “I expect a gift and it better make a sizeable dent in your credit limit!”

They Say:    “Go ahead out, I’ll be fine here on my own tonight.”
It Means:
    “Take one step out that door and you will rue your decision for eternity.”

They Say:      “I’d Love to watch “The Notebook” with you…AGAIN.”  Or
                           “I’d Love to watch “Solo, A Star Wars Story” with you…AGAIN.
It Means:       “OMG, I’d rather drink Drano, poke my eyes out or watch Fox News.”

They Say:       “You are sexier than Emilia Clarke (as Daenerys Targaryen).”   Or
                             “You are sexier than Jason Momoa.”
It Means:        “I’d crawl a mile on my belly for one night with (__Pick One__).” 

We will explore others in the future.  Stay tuned.

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