Archives for December 2024

Art Critic: “It appears to be completely empty.”
Artist:         “Thank you!  Nailed it!”

This lyric written by Johnny Mercer, music by Harry Warren, was for the 1938 film “Going Places.”  86 years ago there was no internet so answering questions like this was not as easy as it is today.  I’ll bet that many people were never able to answer the question so simply went peeper-less.  What a shame.

Today a quick search will offer a myriad of options but most of us will opt for the peepers at Amazon.com, where an adequate model of Peepers will only cost about $22.00; free 2-day delivery for Prime members.

Knowledge is Power!

Words to live by from poet and novelist Margaret Durand.  This has become my morning mantra.
The only thing stopping me is my inability to find Jennifer Aniston’s phone number and I am uncomfortable referring to her as “It.”  Does anyone have her number?  Please share.

(The above action is done with Linda’s approval.  When I explained it to her she said “Sure, go ahead and tell me how it works out for you.”  I must admit I may have hear a slight note of sarcasm in her reply).

Dr. Sanjay Gupta’s on-line newsletter says yes. Forcefully blowing your nose can actually worsen your cold symptoms, says Dr. Peter Flip, a rhinologist and skull base surgeon at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago. Excessive nose blowing can cause a backward pressure of fluid draining from the sinuses. This could make an infection worse while also causing ear pain, headaches and nosebleeds.

One must, however, do a quick risk vs. reward analysis.  If you’ve blown a giant snot-ball to leave as a message on the windshield of the jerk in the lot that parked to close or left his shopping cart behind your car, a slight headache or nosebleed seems inconsequential.

True justice comes at a price!

Bummer!

Born:  Mt. Sinai Hospital, Chicago, IL December 14, 1950

Lived In:   Chicago, Los Angeles, Culver City CA, Torrance, El Cajon CA, Simi Valley CA, Northridge CA,  San Diego, Lisle IL, Chicago IL, Virginia Beach, Pasig City Philippines, Oceanside CA, Lewes England (Only 30 days but it counts!), Wilsonville OR.

Education: Darwin Elementary Chicago, Burnside Ave. Los Angeles, Farragut Elementary Culver City, Culver City Jr. High, Culver City High School, Hamilton High Los Angeles, Santa Monica College, California State University Northridge, Graduate Work UCLA (OK a bit of a stretch. I took one evening accounting class and made it through 4 or 5 sessions.  But the humiliation taught me a life lesson so it also counts!)

Love: August 1974 invited to friends house after work to be the fourth player for a game of Hearts with them and their neighbor, Linda. (Yes, it was a set-up).  October 1974, invited to Linda’s apartment to watch “The Poseidon Adventure” on her color TV.  Never looked back.  Married June 13, 1976. Everything that means anything in my life came from her including Robert, Greg and Alan.

Future: Whatev! But three things for sure: Linda, Linda & Linda!

And of course, YOU, Our friends and family around the world! We send our love and sincere thanks for your lovely greetings.

Another Breaking News headline from People Magazine’s on-line newsletter.  First by a show of hands:
     1.  Who has even a slight inkling as to who either of the two people are?
     2.  Who cares who either of these two people are?
     3.  Is this really headline material, two pseudo-celebrities getting a divorce.

If they are going to delve into the world of domestic unrest at least provide all the relevant facts.  I’d go to Wikipedia to check them out but then I’d have to sift through pages of begging for donations to keep this terribly inaccurate website going.  I already pay a fortune in taxes to get misinformation from Washington, D.C. 

And if you think it’s bad now, wait until January 20, 2025, when all expectation of truth will fly away leaving nothing but world class gobbledygook emanating from our nation’s leaders.  The situation is best described by the prophetic words of Cantor Jakie Rabinowitz, Al Jolson in his most famous role as The Jazz Singer, when on October 6, 1927 at the Warner Theater on Broadway, during the world premiere of the first talking motion picture that synchronized sound and vocal track, Jakie warned us “You ain’t heard nothing yet!”

Did you have any idea that this seemingly innocuous rant would veer into yet another political condemnation?  I sure didn’t!

No, not hate.  FEAR!
Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.

So if you bought into the scare tactics employed by politicians and believe “there are good people on both sides,” and all we have to do is expel others not like us then you need to do the following:

• Locate the closest Chuck E. Cheese or Bullwinkle Fun Center.
• Make a substantial donation to Feeding America.
• Get back on your meds.
• Realize Carbs are not the enemy.  Try portion control!
• Only go to Disneyland on Super Bowl Sunday.
• You are NOT always right.  There can only be one of us with that gift.
• From now on consult me on all important decisions.

Now aren’t you feeling better already?  NEXT!

In about 1935 DuPont came up with this advertising slogan; the chemistry one.  The Costco replacement is mine.

Today I had my Costco hearing aids serviced there, my eyeglass frames adjusted (also purchased there), picked up 6 prescriptions at their pharmacy plus 2 cases of protein shakes and had a free lunch of samples that included a feta and onion tart, a soup dumpling, crackers with brie and 1/4 of a turkey on white with mayo.  All this while avoiding being tempted by both their loss leader Sodium Bomb $5 Rotisserie Chickens and the tasty $1.50 roll of fat and mystery meat they call hot dogs.

“Better living through Costco!”  If not better, at least a little more convenient if you love large crowds and jumbo boxes of cereal!

Although unverified it is believed that most of the devotees to this daily rambling are actually literate and able to comprehend well above most of our countrymen which, I believe is at the 6th grade level. 

For those of you that meet this rigorous criteria I suggest; no, I insist that you immediately go to Amazon and buy the book “The Master Course You Can Have It All!”  by Author, Teacher, Empath and possible ET, JL Scott.  It’s an owner’s manual for life.  I must get much of the sage advice that I freely share in these pages from somewhere (Please don’t blame Ms. Scott for that).  Her pronouns are genius and guru.  She is Socrates, Mr. Miyagi and Granny Clampett all rolled into one bundle of home-spun wisdom that will improve your life.

I have no financial interest and have never laid eyes on the author, but her words speak to all of us in this age of uncertainty and fear.  If you wish to travel the road of transformation and create the success of your dreams, follow the master course.  I am so sure of how much you will gain from reading her words I will make you this deal.  If you read the book and do not find it life-changing, I will hand write an original Haiku just for you, sign it and send it to you at no charge.  You won’t find one of those on EBay!