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Archives for July 2024

“Sewer Rat May Taste Like Pumpkin Pie But I’ll Never Know” Jules Winnfield

07.21.2024 by Fred Berman //

Pulp Fiction aficionados may recall the scene where Vincent Vega was waxing poetic about how much he loves pork and Jules told him he doesn’t eat pork.  To Vincent’s question “Why not, Pork Chops are good, bacon is good” Jules came back with the above quote.  He told Vincent pigs are filthy animals.  The scene reminded me that we all have self-imposed boundaries we’ve given ourselves for protection.  They stop us from doing things that might be pleasurable but can have deadly consequences. 

Jules doesn’t eat pork, the meat of a filthy animal.  Vincent eats pork but has limits like deciding against trying to bang Mia Wallace because her husband, Marcellus, has been known to throw men off the roof like he did to Tony Rockihara after Tony was rumored to have given Mia a foot rub.

So what are your limits?  What food won’t you eat or what act will you not attempt regardless of the upside because the downside is too risky?  When you think of it please keep it to yourself because no one cares what you do.

Another Teachable Moment brought to you by BetterFredThanDead, your guide to a more fulfilling life and untold riches!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

55 Years Ago Today Neil Armstrong Took “One Small Step for Man…”

07.20.2024 by Fred Berman //

On this day in 1969 Neil Armstrong became the first man to walk on the moon igniting our spirit of adventure and fueling our dreams and hopes for a future of exploration and explanation of the mysteries of our existence.  In reality we have become a nation of fearful sycophants following a narcissistic sociopath into the depths of depravity and oblivion devoid of freedom and individuality.

Have a nice day!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

Want to Lose 10 Lbs. of Ugly Fat?

07.19.2024 by Fred Berman //

Cut off your head!  Hahahahaha!  Old joke and I’ve used it before.  But this time I can show you the real thing…losing fat, not cutting off your head.

At Sono Bello They say you can lose up to 4 sizes and be “swimsuit ready” in one visit.  Their trademark protected Trisculpt method allows them to employ their multi-area fat removal program with only local anesthetic.  Think mini-vacuum cleaner for fat cells. (That has got to hurt!)

So if you are a gambler and would rather chance death or permanent disfigurement over healthy eating and exercise, Sono Bello might be the Golden Ticket!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

“Fish and Visitors Smell After Three Days!” Benjamin Franklin

07.18.2024 by Fred Berman //

If Ben were here today he might rewrite it.  “Most Politicians and Supreme Court Judges smell.”   No 3 day grace period needed.

Categories // Daily Inflammation

Random Thought: Is It Time for a Keyboard Makeover?

07.17.2024 by Fred Berman //

Sitting at my ASUS laptop it struck me that while the space bar is about 3 1/2” the shift key, arguably as important a key, is only 1 1/2“ in length.  I understand that you use the space bar with both hands but with letter keys at less than 3/4” you could have split the key in two, knock 1/4” off the shift and have room for at least two additional keys.  At last a Jubilee Key can come standard on every keyboard. 

Why doesn’t anyone think to ask me these things before jumping into a critical decision?  I can help!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

“Either You Are Closing Your Eyes to a Situation You Do Not Wish to Acknowledge…”

07.16.2024 by Fred Berman //

“…Or you are not aware of the caliber of disaster indicated by the presence of a pool table in your community!”
This was the warning Professor Harold Hill delivered to the residents of River City Iowa in the 1957 Broadway premier of Meredith Wilson’s “The Music Man.”

Well my friends, we got trouble right here in our country and it’s not a pool table.  The country is being taken over by greedy slime more dangerous than a phony professor selling the idea of a boy’s band to make River City great again.  Let’s hope the citizens open their eyes and this show closes in Palm Beach before getting to Broadway in November.

There’s no business like show business…except politics.

Categories // Daily Inflammation

Remembering the Gift of Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

07.15.2024 by Fred Berman //

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi was the creator of the Statue of Liberty. Born in Alsace, France, in 1834, Bartholdi was a sculptor. In 1865, he proposed building a gigantic statue to represent freedom and democracy for the United States. At first, he wanted to call the statue “The Statue of Liberty Enlightening the World”, but that was later cut to the now well-known Statue of Liberty and familiarly, Lady Liberty.

Lady Liberty is currently seeking a new home where individual freedoms are still protected. 

Categories // Daily Inflammation

Be Calm Grasshopper: Life is a Mystery to All

07.14.2024 by Fred Berman //

We mortals have no ability to see into the future.  We must live life to the fullest as today is the first day of the rest of your life, but it may also be your last.  
Be empathetic, spread joy and above all, if you owe me money, please Zelle me ASAP!

Namaste

Categories // Daily Inflammation

I’m Back! The Strike is Over

07.13.2024 by Fred Berman //

After some tough negotiations I talked myself into ending the strike and coming back to work.  But don’t get too comfortable.  I may walk out at any time.  I am a conundrum wrapped in a mystery.  Only those closest to me know of what I am capable.  I keep my friends close, but my enemies closer, which is not too difficult as I have only one friend and a boatload of enemies.

Come closer!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

Site For Sale – On Strike!

07.12.2024 by Fred Berman //

Closed due to Writer’s Strike.  I shut down not for the reason you might have heard, that I can’t think of anything else to say, but in solidarity with the striking writer’s guild.  Yes, I am a little late to the game, the strike may have ended long ago, but better late than never.

Power to the people!

Categories // Daily Inflammation

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