Thoughts
by Fred Berman //
Lately I have been consumed with getting answers to life’s most puzzling questions, For example, did…
Perhaps we were not meant to know everything. Let us simply be grateful we exist and appreciate what we do know.
For example, I was able to learn how life began and what happens when we pass and ascend to the next level. That’s something!
by Fred Berman //
Today I share with you another of the hundreds of unsolicited emails I receive daily. This Lifestyles email with the above title attempts to give you insight into the minds of us senior citizens. Since I am part of the first group mentioned, old people, I assume it is you that don’t understand so let me explain. Here are a few things we like:
The only thing I don’t quite understand is number one on the list:
“Being the first to tell others when someone had died” – Not something I would ever enjoy unless, of course, it was about a corrupt politician or judge (aka a politician or judge). Then I might even be a bit giddy while maintaining the proper somber demeanor…L (but not OL).
by Fred Berman //
Good information from the AARP Advice for Seniors. Can you guess what exercise they suggest?
It’s “The Squat” for leg strength. I understand because when I did go to the gym regularly, many moons ago, I always hated “leg days” and was most likely to abbreviate my work out. However their reasoning was a touch more specific. They list the number one reason as maintaining the strength to get up off the toilet. Really? Really!
You’d think that would be the #2 reason.
by Fred Berman //
In order to keep my covenant with the Universe and be allowed to mindlessly rant, I must actually impart wisdom at least once a year so consider this a “teachable moment.”
“The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that.” Lao Tzu
Let the past go. BE PRESENT! Focus on your love and gratitude for what you have now. Eat, love, pray, forgive, be grateful; send fred money, oops sorry, old habits die hard; help those less fortunate, show compassion, return your shopping basket to the cart-corral; recycle paper, bottles and cans, return library books early; accept a package for your neighbor and then actually give it to him; call your Mom wherever she may be; eschew foie gras, Kobe beef and veal but do eat produce from local growers and patronize local merchants; dance even though you think you look ridiculous (you really do, it’s hysterical); vote in favor of bond issues for education and emergency services and vote against fascist narcissists with embarrassing comb-overs; change your underwear daily and use biodegradable cleaning products.
Feel free to add to the list. If I think of anything else I’ll give you a call,
by Fred Berman //
A common hygiene product or apt description of the republican leader and candidate for President:
O U E H C D G B A
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by Fred Berman //
From the NPR Health Journal: “New research suggests that committing small acts of kindness, joy, or reflection can significantly increase a person’s sense of well-being, as NPR’s Allison Aubrey reports. Over 70,000 participants in more than 200 countries signed up for the Big Joy Project, an ongoing collaboration between UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center and other institutions. You practice daily “micro-acts” of kindness, something as small as a smile to a stranger, helping someone reach the top shelf at the supermarket or congratulating a co-worker on an accomplishment. There are unlimited ways to share a bit of joy. A preliminary analysis published this week shows that participants experienced about a 25% increase in emotional well-being over the course of that week.”
For those of you that would like to increase your well-being please come over this Saturday. I will be cleaning out my garage and can provide you multiple opportunities to perform acts of kindness. It just might be the greatest day of your life!
by Fred Berman //
Unless you think the difference is green tea is cultivated under the sun, while matcha tea is shade-grown in the three weeks before it is harvested. Green tea grows dull green with a brownish tone, and matcha tea grows a vibrant green color. The shade increases the chlorophyll levels in the leaves that turn matcha its bright color. Many of the documented health benefits of green tea are linked to the flavonoids present in tea leaves. A recently published study in the Advances in Nutrition journal reported that daily flavonoid intake from tea was associated with reduced risk of death from heart disease and any cause of death.
If it only didn’t taste like boiled sweat socks I think we’d be on to something. I’m sure Jolt Cola, a Peppermint Frappuccino with double-sugar and a fruit punch are just as healthy. Taste buds don’t lie!
by Fred Berman //
I recently realized that there is a mass market for video games geared to an older audience. A few small adjustments to popular games can generate millions of dollars from an untapped market. Examples below.
Original: CALL OF DUTY – First person shooter game originally set in WWII.
Boomer: CALL OF DOODY – American travelling solo in the mean streets of Europe desperately trying to find a toilet.
Original: COUNTER STRIKE: A multi-player tactical first person shooter; terrorists vs. counter terrorists.
Boomer: COUNTER STROKE – Intrepid senior-citizen searching for blood thinners and compression socks to ward off a stroke.
Original: STREET FIGHTER – Ryu versus former partner Ken in martial arts battles.
Boomer: FLEET FIGHTER – Gamer struggles to get enough fiber in his diet to avoid the pre-measured FLEET under the bathroom sink.
Original: MORTAL KOMBAT – Elaborate fighting franchise taking place in several realms.
Boomer: MAGA KOMBAT – A human being tries to save a dying Earth Realm led by an alien sociopath with a bad comb-over.
Original: WORLD OF WARCRAFT – Began as Orcs trying to conquer human kingdoms. Now?
Boomer: WORLD OF BEERCRAFT – In a dystopian world where the saloons are filled with undrinkable craft beers with names like Purple Monkey Dishwasher, Hoppy Ending and MILF Imperial Stout, a man tries to hunt down a Budweiser.
Why am I not a millionaire? I must be ahead of my time!
by Fred Berman //
The holiday season is here and with it comes a flood of scammers and an avalanche of new ways to steal your money. Some of the methods are surprisingly simple yet many intelligent and aware people fall victim during this season where our hearts go out to those less fortunate people in need.
On November 14th at 7:00PM the AARP is holding a free webinar on the latest scams and how to avoid them. If you would like me to sign you up please send the $25.00 fee directly to me and I will see you have a spot reserved. To make things easier, if you prefer not to send cash, simply email your bank login and password information and I will do the rest. Sit back and have a worry free holiday season.
See? Never let your guard down! Now about that password…
by Fred Berman //
At the time of my retirement I had amassed 993,000 and knew getting the 7,000 would be a challenge. But with a few domestic flights I just crossed the required one million miles flown on Delta Airlines. Along with a boarding gate announcement, a Famous Amos chocolate chip cookie (immediately consumed by Linda), and a “Million Miler” passport case I received a thousand dollar credit toward my next flight on Delta.
Not bad for a poor boy from the south side of Chicago in the badest part of town. If you’d have asked that young lad with stars in his eyes how many frequent flier miles he would amass in his lifetime he would have sheepishly replied: “How the F*&% do I know?”
Dare to dream!