Archives for 2022

     A skerry is a rocky islet that is typically not large enough for humans to live on. Mostly formed by glacial erosion, they’re common along the high-latitude coastlines of Norway, Iceland, and Greenland, as well as other areas of the Northern Hemisphere. The term “skerry” comes from the Old Norse word “sker,” which means “rock in the sea.”
     It is not to be confused with the word “Scary” which describes what it is when a group of politicians running our country blindly follow a defeated, sociopathic, megalomaniacal liar with a bad comb over.  Although, come to think of it, a skerry would be a great place to exile a scary narcissist.

And Capitol Hill is where it goes to die.

You are proof that it is possible to be a world class racist and delusional conspiracy theory spewing psycho and still be one of the greatest living rock guitarists.

If only you had resisted that one last magic mushroom back in the 60’s you might have remained a productive member of the human race! 
C’est la vie?

In a move that has is sure to have him nominated for the coveted “Neo-Nazi of the Year” award, the governor has created a tip line so parents can report teachers who teach Critical Race Theory, also known as “The Truth,” a practice he has banned from the classroom.

It is rumored that this is just the beginning.  A senior advisor that asked to remain anonymous said the governor’s hope is that this will be a big step in the ending of democracy leading to his permanent appointment as Governor for Life, allowing him to worship at the altar of King Donald forever. “There is no way to wash off the stink of trump so you might as well be in a place where it goes unnoticed!”

    The bar or bat mitzvah ceremony isn’t a mandatory rite of passage.  By Jewish law, a boy reaches adulthood when he turns 13 and a girl at 12, no ceremony required.  The very lack of necessity makes such an effort even more remarkable as a public affirmation of Jewish identity and commitment; not to mention a reason for a big party and many gifts.

As I continue to struggle in my quest to become fluent in Spanish, I know I will never be able to master the Hebrew language.  So while I believe beautiful ceremonies and traditions are the best part of any organized religion, I am skipping them all and going right to the party and gifts.  You are all invited. Probably will take place about a year from Shavuot.

This message from our local Fred Meyer Supermarket, (owned by the giant Kroger chain).  RAMPANT AGE DESCRIMINATION!  In order to get the best prices you now must own a computer or have a smartphone to download the App.  And if you do have the app or go to their website navigating to find the mystery digital coupon becomes a time consuming treasure hunt; the reward for your trouble being 50 cents off the inflated price of some inferior store brand product they are pushing this week to deplete the massive overstock of a soon-to-be-out-of-date product ordered by the dimwitted child of a company executive because a salesman showed him the only love he has ever felt by taking him to lunch. This all because he was raised by an absentee mother and an uncaring father who did not even try to hide the fact he had no love for him because it all went to his sister Ivanka. 

I may have mixed up a few rants but you get the idea.

SOPHISTRY –  [ sof–uh-stree ]
1.  A subtle, tricky, superficially plausible, but generally fallacious method of reasoning.
2.  A false argument;

Today, Congress consists of 100 senators and 435 voting members of the House of Representatives. I figure about 10% of them know the meaning of the word yet it describes 99% of their communications.
Use sophistry in a sentence:
“If we remove all the Sophistries from The Congressional Record the entire document would be reduced to two lines: ‘The session is called to order’ and “We are adjourned.”

I saw this article on MSN today.  It had the old standards you might expect; Walt Disney World Resort, Kennedy Space Center, Universal Orlando Resort and the Everglades National Park.  But there were many interesting places that are not household words such as Edward Ball Wakulla Springs State Park, The Vizcaya Museum and Gardens, Ah-Tah-Thi-Ki Museum in Clewiston and the WonderWorks building in Orlando.

There is one major downside of all 50 spots.  In order to see them you have to go to Florida. Yuck.  Still, if you are not gunned down in the street by some nut-bag with a concealed carry permit standing his mythical ground, infected by an unmasked conspiracy theory whack-o, rendered soggy by the heat and humidity, eaten by an alligator, crushed by a python or attacked by a million of the horrific flying roaches called palmetto bugs, you may enjoy visiting a few of these attractions.  But probably not.

While open to interpretation, I believe this message from the teachings of Edgar Cayce goes out to all the murderers, serial killers, rapists, pedophiles, and mimes of the world.  Seriously STOP!  Begin a new day as a non-annoying and law-abiding citizen. A grateful world thanks you.

Fortunately Law Enforcement Agencies around the globe will not stop searching, capturing and incarcerating you.  Many of you will share a cell and provide a rectum for Bubba “Foot Long” Duggar; others will be treated to an injection of pancuronium bromide, potassium chloride and midazolam, a cocktail guaranteed to cure insomnia brought on by guilt and lack of remorse.

Way to go Edgar.  Once again…you NAILED IT!

Holland was an American physician turned poet and novelist in the 19th century.  I believe he gave up medicine out of guilt, after the death of Ezekiel Sproutedwheat, a friend and regular patient in for his weekly routine prostate check.  Holland wanted to vaccinate him for protection against a deadly virus but Ezekiel feared the vaccine was a means of the government injecting mind control microbes into his body. So Dr. Holland went with his heart instead of the science, not wanting to cause his fearful patient further anxiety.

On his death bed Holland recanted, telling everyone that the heart is not actually wiser but causes you to do stupid things like not get vaccinated.  He asked that the following words, his final poem, be his epitaph and indelibly etched on his gravestone:

          “Fraidy-Cat, Moron, Simpleton and Jerk,
            Descriptions of anti-vaxxers that work!”